It's over. I am no longer a student. I have written, handed in and defended my thesis, now all I need is a diploma to make it official.
I haven't blogged because I've spent the past five months drowning in words and at the end of the day writing something voluntarily (or functioning at all) has not been an option.
There has been very little in my life apart from deadlines, translating, writing and nightmares about deadlines, translating and writing. It feels like it was one ridiculously long week of translating during the week, going to bed at 10.30 PM on Friday to wake up on Saturday to write my thesis over the weekend, but instead it was about 5000 weeks like that.
I have exhausted myself and probably everyone I know with complaining, so I'm making this one last post about it and be done with this bitch of a semester forever.
And since I'm just so sick and tired of words, here are some numbers instead:
113 pages of my Master's thesis
23 pages of a notebook covered with thesis notes ranging from neatly written and numbered complete sentences to intricate drawings to often illegible attempts to keep up with my thoughts at rare moments of ingeniousness resulting in fun notes such as "find out how 'penis' is used" and "NO penetration" (both related to the thesis, I swear), 90 degree changes in the thought process such as "add reference to first paragraph, buy milk" and switches between languages like "one sentence is missing leheküljel 34!"
4 jobs I was working while writing that thesis
19 work-related e-mails during one day (maximum)
97 times when I felt like I was drowning in e-mails and couldn't breathe
3 times when I considered crying because I felt there was no other way to deal with the stress
1 time I actually did cry
4 weeks with more than three 12+n-hour work days
14 times when I was so tired by the end of the day that all I could do was wrap myself in a blanket and watch John Oliver
200 or more cups of green tea - by now my body is pretty much 90% green tea
6137 times I wished I was married to Mika
6200 times I wished I was married to John Oliver (sorry, Mika)
0 weekends completely off
0 shots of tequila
4 days where I suddenly had no deadlines and became so stressed from the lack of stress I didn't know what to do with myself
74 gym sessions at 8 AM (tsau Maria) that kept me sane
270 km jogged or walked
infinite number of apologies I have to make to the people in my life for never being there (or passing out on their couches really early if I actually was there)
2 people who no longer talk to me (at least)
still quite a lot of people who actually do talk to me
500 hours of sleep I have to catch up with
568 times I uttered the words "I'm just so tired"
5 weeks when I wasn't tired at all even though I slept an average of 6 hours per night
not enough times when I laughed until I cried
so much love
But it's over. I survived and quite successfully, I'd say.
Plus, there were also (rare) moments like these
And others.
And now...
One day, Mika, one day...
(PS, ma mõnikord ausalt kirjutan eesti keeles ka)
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